Life is Good

I have just been feeling so overwhelmed by blessings lately. I have the best friends in the whole world, the sweetest, most helpful husband, great new neighbors, (I could keep listing... family, church, rain, books, brownies...) and these two beautiful sons.

Knowing that these are my last few days with Mason as our only child (although Teshale is ours completely already, Mason is the only one we get to interact with at this point), I have been just really enjoying him. Not to say he's been perfect; he's been testing every limit possible. But I just continually feel overwhelmed by love for him, and amazed at who and what he is becoming. Every time he shares a toy or a treat, or comes up with a new sentence, or remembers what happened two weeks ago in striking detail, I am just amazed.

He started out as this helpless mushy little bean (that's what he felt like in my arms at least, in all his 6 pound glory) and is becoming this person, completely seperate from me, at times fiercely independent, at times fiercely cuddly. Both melt my heart-- when we are walking on the sidewalk he'll remind me that he doesn't have to hold my hand ("Mason walking on street, no, I walking on sidewalk, I not hold your hand", very matter-of-factly). He gave me a hug today that literally took my breath away-- a little tight around the neck-- then pulled back, gave me three little kisses, and when I told him that he's a good cuddler, said, "Thank you," also very matter of factly. He's even polite!

All this to say, I am just overwhelmed by my blessings! This is an amazing stage and I am so excited to see Mason and Teshale learn to love each other.

I am praying that God is preparing Teshale's heart for us, that he will recognize us from the pictures we sent a few months ago, that he will be able to accept our love and affection, that he will quickly learn to feel safe with us, and that his grieving and adjustment will not be too drawn out. I really don't know what to expect as far as his bonding process-- I'm reading about toddler adoption and of course each child is so different, so who knows where Teshale will fall in that spectrum. I try to predict his personality from the 3 pictures we have of him but of course that is ridiculous :)

I'm going to need some grace from family and friends as we adjust. I don't know how much we'll be able to get out, to help out, to continue with our regular activities. So that's my warning and plea now :)