Kung Fu Adoption Talk
I seriously think there should be some alert system for adoptive parents... *Adoption-Related Content. Parental Guidance Suggested*. That would be sufficient for me.
So... I took Levi, his brothers and friends to see Kung Fu Panda 2 for his birthday. Just walked right in without any thought of possible adoption related bombshells.
Happy Birthday, Levi!
We start with the characters playing Chubby Bunny, Chinese-food style, and before you know it, POW! Flashback, the main character suddenly realizes he was adopted after his parents abandoned him in a vegetable bin outside of a restaurant amid sword fighting and all sorts of other random "kid-friendly" violence. So I am sinking into my scratchy seat at the dollar movies (because, yes, that is how we roll), wondering what emotional trauma I am dredging up with this violent take on adoption. Wondering how in the world Levi is processing all of this?!?
He watches the whole movie, barely blinking, happily giggling at all the silly parts and enthralled by the kiddie kung-fu fighting (have I mentioned this movie is basically one long fight scene, not-so-perfect for boys who have recently been getting in trouble with all the never-ending wrestling and sword fighting and anykindoffightingyoucanthinkof fighting?)
The movie ends, we go get food-court lunch (I did mention this was a high-end birthday celebration, right?) and when we finally leave he basically has a melt-down in the car. Overtired? Inner turmoil? No idea.
So, until today I hadn't found a great moment to bring it up in private to see if there was anything he wanted to talk about. But Micah got sick and Mason was at Lolo's today and God plopped a very nice lunch date in our laps.
So he's happily munching his PB&H (I'm telling you, we are fancy around here) and I nonchalantly bring up the movie.
"So, Levi, Kung Fu Panda was pretty fun, huh? I was surprised to find out Po is adopted, just like you!" (open-ended statement, leaving room for any thoughts or feelings. Smooooth.)
"Yep!"
"How do you think Po felt when he found out he was adopted?"
"Happy!" (two syllables, 100% improvement on the first answer. Doing good.)
"Yes, he probably was! (Although not really so much in the movie, but we'll go with it.) His story was a lot different than yours though, wasn't it?"
"Yep!" (closed question, I asked for it. Fail.)
"It seemed like it was pretty scary in the movie."
"Yeah, and remember when they were all stuffing food in his mouth to see how much could fit in? That was really funny."
"Umm, yes. Hilarious. So, um... remember at the end of the movie, when they show Po's first family, and they find out Po is still alive?"
"Yep!"
"How do you think his first family felt?
"Happy!" (duh. I'm struggling.) "Mom, I'm trying to think of something I could fit in my mouth like that. Do you think a lot of chocolate bars?"
"Um, maybe. Um, do you ever wonder if you have anyone in Africa that's still thinking of you? Any family, like aunts and uncles?"
-blank stare---- "Yeesss, yes, probably. Maybe watermelon. Do you think I could do that with watermelon?"
"I don't know. Maybe. Levi, remember when you had a sad day a couple months ago, when you were missing your Africa mommy and daddy?"
"Yes."
"Have you had any more sad feelings?"
"Nope! Mom, do you think the watermelon would work?"
"Um, I think that might actually make you throw up. I don't really think you should try it. Levi, I'm glad we are having a special lunch together. I like being with you."
"Me too."
And that's that.
So... I took Levi, his brothers and friends to see Kung Fu Panda 2 for his birthday. Just walked right in without any thought of possible adoption related bombshells.
Happy Birthday, Levi!
We start with the characters playing Chubby Bunny, Chinese-food style, and before you know it, POW! Flashback, the main character suddenly realizes he was adopted after his parents abandoned him in a vegetable bin outside of a restaurant amid sword fighting and all sorts of other random "kid-friendly" violence. So I am sinking into my scratchy seat at the dollar movies (because, yes, that is how we roll), wondering what emotional trauma I am dredging up with this violent take on adoption. Wondering how in the world Levi is processing all of this?!?
He watches the whole movie, barely blinking, happily giggling at all the silly parts and enthralled by the kiddie kung-fu fighting (have I mentioned this movie is basically one long fight scene, not-so-perfect for boys who have recently been getting in trouble with all the never-ending wrestling and sword fighting and anykindoffightingyoucanthinkof fighting?)
The movie ends, we go get food-court lunch (I did mention this was a high-end birthday celebration, right?) and when we finally leave he basically has a melt-down in the car. Overtired? Inner turmoil? No idea.
So, until today I hadn't found a great moment to bring it up in private to see if there was anything he wanted to talk about. But Micah got sick and Mason was at Lolo's today and God plopped a very nice lunch date in our laps.
So he's happily munching his PB&H (I'm telling you, we are fancy around here) and I nonchalantly bring up the movie.
"So, Levi, Kung Fu Panda was pretty fun, huh? I was surprised to find out Po is adopted, just like you!" (open-ended statement, leaving room for any thoughts or feelings. Smooooth.)
"Yep!"
"How do you think Po felt when he found out he was adopted?"
"Happy!" (two syllables, 100% improvement on the first answer. Doing good.)
"Yes, he probably was! (Although not really so much in the movie, but we'll go with it.) His story was a lot different than yours though, wasn't it?"
"Yep!" (closed question, I asked for it. Fail.)
"It seemed like it was pretty scary in the movie."
"Yeah, and remember when they were all stuffing food in his mouth to see how much could fit in? That was really funny."
"Umm, yes. Hilarious. So, um... remember at the end of the movie, when they show Po's first family, and they find out Po is still alive?"
"Yep!"
"How do you think his first family felt?
"Happy!" (duh. I'm struggling.) "Mom, I'm trying to think of something I could fit in my mouth like that. Do you think a lot of chocolate bars?"
"Um, maybe. Um, do you ever wonder if you have anyone in Africa that's still thinking of you? Any family, like aunts and uncles?"
-blank stare---- "Yeesss, yes, probably. Maybe watermelon. Do you think I could do that with watermelon?"
"I don't know. Maybe. Levi, remember when you had a sad day a couple months ago, when you were missing your Africa mommy and daddy?"
"Yes."
"Have you had any more sad feelings?"
"Nope! Mom, do you think the watermelon would work?"
"Um, I think that might actually make you throw up. I don't really think you should try it. Levi, I'm glad we are having a special lunch together. I like being with you."
"Me too."
And that's that.
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